Saturday, June 30, 2012

Life is a Garden...

life is a garden,
not a road

we enter and exit
through the same gate

where we go matters less
than what we notice

~ Bokonon

There are times when life moves so quickly we barely see things passing by us. Likewise, life can move slowly giving more than enough time to look deeply into each moment. It's a bit of a mystery really ~ why these stark differences occur. But living in the dualistic world offers time enough for each of us to wander through the garden and notice...

Friday, June 29, 2012

Barriers within...

Your task is not to seek for love
but merely to seek and find
all the barriers within yourself
that you have built against it.

Like the thistle, I have always had little thorns surrounding me. They are so small you might miss them. They are there to protect me from hurt and disappointment and rejection. Seems like it take a lifetime to just begin to notice how these thorns are really barriers stopping the flow of love. All the time I thought I was loving, maybe it really was barrirers built against that flow that gives the illusion of unworthiness, sadness or rejection.

The thistle is such a beautiful wildflower ~ soft and spacious ~ tiny, slender petals of just the lightest lavender reaching for the sun and bursting with such gladness.

Thursday, June 28, 2012

Extraordinary Quietness

Meditation is to find out whether the brain, with all the activities, all its experiences, can be absolutely quiet. Not forced, because the moment you force, there is duality. 

The entity that says, 'I would like to have marvelous experiences, therefore I must force my brain to be quiet,' will never do it. 

But if you begin to inquire, observe, listen to all the movements of thought, its conditioning, its pursuits, its fears, its pleasures, watch how the brain operates, then you will see that the brain becomes extraordinarily quiet; that quietness is not sleep but is tremendously active and therefore quiet.

A big dynamo that is working perfectly hardly makes a sound; it is only when there is friction that there is noise.


I find this to be a wonderful image of a mind meditating. Often, we think of quiet as being inactive; but here Krishnamurti reminds us that the truly quiet mind is actually filled with activity. The only noise comes from friction.  

Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Be with YourSelf

First of all, establish a constant contact with your self,
be with yourself all the time.
Into self-awareness all blessings flow.
Begin as a centre of observation, deliberate cognizance,
and grow into a centre of love in action.

'I am' is a tiny seed which will grow into a mighty tree ~
quite naturally, without a trace of effort.
~ Nisargadatta Maharaj ~

When I began to practice Yoga over 40 years ago, I was hoping to feel better, to find joy, to be flexible, to have more energy, and maybe even find enlightenment or self-realization. I didn't understand what this "I am" was and certainly didn't think it would be as easy as just observing, being cognizant of each moment.

Yet over the years my practice evolved from trying to being, from striving to letting go, from strict disciple to knowing when and how to practice. If enlightenment is not a thing to attain and realizing this is found in each moment, then I think I am beginning to understand. Being with mySelf all the time, awareness brings grace and blessings whether the experience is joy or sadness, struggle or ease, stillness or activity.

I am grateful for each moment...

Sunday, June 24, 2012


What is the root of pain? Ignorance of yourself. 
What is the root of desire? The urge to find yourself. 
All creation toils for its self and will not rest until it returns to it. 

Nisargadatta Maharaj

The Banyan trees in Florida are amazing examples of roots expanding and seeking to take hold in the space all around. As if the desire to find itself is all consuming. For most of my life, there has been a similar urge to understand why I am here, who I am, and all of that. It has taken me to many dark places as I root into the unconcscious in an attempt to bring light to my endless desire to know.

Lately, what comes is a feeling that knowing is always right here and the toil isn't necessary. The flow of life moves us along like a river. Sometimes it fast, exciting and perhaps a bit overwhelming; other times is meanders along or crawls at a snails pace. I've found it is in the letting go that all these opposites dissolve into the Presence that is each moment unfolding fresh and new.  

Saturday, June 23, 2012

All is a Miracle

I like to walk alone on country paths, rice plants and wild grasses on both sides, putting each foot down on the earth in mindfulness, knowing that I walk on the wondrous earth. In such moments, existence is a miraculous and mysterious reality. People usually consider walking on water or in thin air a miracle. But I think the real miracle is not to walk either on water or in thin air, but to walk on earth. Every day we are engaged in a miracle which we don't even recognize: a blue sky, white clouds, green leaves, the black, curious eyes of a child- our own two eyes. All is a miracle.

~Thich Nhat Hanh
The Miracle of Mindfulness

Yesterday I decided to walk mindfully around my house. As I am recovering from surgery, I can't "do" much of anything I love ~ Yoga, walking, gardening, and such. But the thought entered quietly, inhale, lift the foot, feel the foot floating through space; exhale, feel toes and foot touch the floor. Sometimes we do this mindfulness practice in class or on retreat. The beach is a perfectly lovely place! For now it is simply the place where my feet gently touch whatever is beneath them...

Friday, June 22, 2012

So I Love You Because...

Sonnet XVII (I do not love you...)
by Pablo Neruda

I do not love you as if you were salt-rose, or topaz,
or the arrow of carnations the fire shoots off.
I love you as certain dark things are to be loved,
in secret, between the shadow and the soul.

I love you as the plant that never blooms
but carries in itself the light of hidden flowers;
thanks to your love a certain solid fragrance,
risen from the earth, lives darkly in my body.

I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where.
I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride;
so I love you because I know no other way

than this: where I does not exist, nor you,
so close that your hand on my chest is my hand,
so close that your eyes close as I fall asleep.

Yes, this is a bit "dark," but it speaks to me at a level that is so visceral and I need to start posting again. It's been a long, long time. Funny, I have over forty drafts and can't seem to find the time to post...

After so many years, I have found that love, real love, is so like this. Loving without knowing from where and without complexities. Truly, there is no other way to love than from this place where "I does not exist, nor you..."